Urban Guru your inspired guide to urban living

The story goes something like this, a guy is drowning in the ocean and he prays to God to save him, a big piece of drift wood floats by, but he ignores it, knowing that God will answer his prayers, a guy in a small dingy offers him a lift, and eventually a helicopter comes to rescue him, but he refuses saying that he’s waiting for God to save him. He drowns. And when he comes before his maker, he asks God why he didn’t save him? God says, “What do you think all those opportunities I sent you were?”

I’ve always been the ‘lucky guy’, maybe not actually being the winning holder of that many lottery tickets, but in life, the good stuff seems to come my way.

The truth is that people and impressive opportunities are always knocking at my door, phoning me up or emailing me. The thing is, I kinda expect them, and when they come, I’m pretty chilled about them.

For example, over a year ago a TV producer was planning to pitch a cool new Urban Guru lifestyle makeover programme to the BBC, and we spoke for about an hour, and then he never got back to me. I was fast asleep when he called and asked to speak to the Urban Guru, so when we were chatting I completely forgot to ask for his contact details, and because I had previously fantasised about having my own prime-time TV programme, I just believed that it would happen to me.

A production company working for MTV called me the other day, but it’s just not worked out.

So good opportunities happen but for some reason they often don’t seem to follow through. And this has been something that has been bothering me but I just didn’t know who to ask about it.

Then about two months ago, I was in the Northern Quarter of Manchester doing some flyering for the Mind Body Spirit festival, when I randomly bumped into a young lady doing flyering for her own Holistic Massage business.

We got chatting, she shared some Blue-Tack, and then while we were giving some leaflets to the Buddhist Centre, the CEO of the Mind Body Spirit festival called to find out if I knew anyone that could do Holistic Massage at the festival, because someone had dropped out, and he wanted someone to fill in, on a percentage of their profits basis.

This was some cool divine providence going on, and how cool was that, I was being used as a messenger and channel for giving this girl a fantastic opportunity for her business.

But two weeks went by and she didn’t phone or get in touch with the festivals CEO, and guess what? He’d filled it with someone else.

The moral of this story, which I experienced first hand, was telling me something completely relevant and profound about my own problem.

Opportunities come knocking all the time, don’t let them pass you by, grab them by the horns and really go for them!

God is giving you fantastic opportunities all the time, your job is to take hold of those opportunities run with them.

If you’re alive and if you’ve ever taken a moment to think about the big questions, then you’ll probably admit that life is a little bit crazy.
After years of pondering this and other important questions, i’ve had one or two fairly cheesy but profound realisations:

Each and everyone of us has to activate a feeling of love within us and in every moment in life we are given new and different opportunities to love.

To love the people in our lives, including ourselves, to love the beings in our lives, to love the stuff in our lives and to love our lives.

The kind of love that I’m talking about isn’t theoretical or a general ‘isn’t everybody lovely’ fluffy feeling. What I’m referring to is a real, deep love, that is the kind of love we have for a child, or a sibling or a parent or a spouse.

Obviously all of those types of love are slightly different, but the feeling, the feeling of love is the same. I’m suggesting that we foster and nurture that feeling of love within ourselves and that we actively allow that energy to flow to the world and people around us.

Thus we transform ourselves and we transform the world.

In a place were there is love all are happy and at peace.

My mum’s doctor has told her she needs to lose at least 3st, but when it comes to diets, she doesn’t stay motivated. I’m worried for her health - how can I encourage her to take action?

–

Trying to motivate someone else is a difficult thing, I’ve got lots of experience doing that, and the old saying is still true, “You can lead the horse to water, but you can’t make it drink”. This is especially true for parents, who have spent many years of their life telling you, what you should and should not be doing. Ultimately it’s her life and no amount of pushing is going to work long-term.

What I would suggest (and I know it might sound a little ‘left field’) is spend a little each day thinking about her. Imagine her 3st lighter, imagine her happier and fitter, focus on how much you love her and how much she loves you. You see, I believe, that a little bit of real heart-felt love, has a really powerful effect to change and transform the people that we love.

Maybe it’s because of some way-out spiritual connection we have with them, or maybe it’s because, if you spend time feeling real love (and acceptance) for your mum, she’ll see it and feel it in the little things you do and say.

And without any nagging or ‘motivational’ bullying, she will start to feel the love that you have for her, in her own heart, and will make the changes she needs to make, because she feels loved and because she wants to. And also because she’s got a fantastic daughter who loves her and who she wants to be around for, for as long as possible.

I’d also suggest that if she wants to and has some spare cash, she signs up for the Soulmate Lifestyle makeover programme, which makes dieting and loosing weight a no-brainer. See www.soulmatelifestyle.com for more info.

Kabbalah is the mystical tradition found within Judaism, it is said to be as old as civilization itself, it is the myth of a science as old as time, an understanding of life that pre-dates the Bible by some 3000 years.

It is a mystical understanding of the nature of the world and the nature of Self, that helps you to successfully navigate your way through life and the world.

In truth Kabbalah is a whole bunch of ideas that a wide group of people over thousands of years have thought about and contributed to, some were a little wacky and others were pure dam genius!

And although some things may sound strange at first, the more you hear them, and begin to understand them, the easier they are to comprehend and the more they appear ‘pure genius’.

It is said that Kabbalah contains the existential secrets of the universe!

The first Kabbalistic ‘book’ is said to have been taught to Adam in the Garden of Eden by God, sworn to secrecy and quietly passed from Master to pupil from one generation to the next, where the ancient academies learnt these Kabbalistic teachings.

These teaching were eventually passed on to Abraham and then Moses, from Moses to the Men of the Great assembly and from teacher to student in the Talmudic era, up to and including Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai, who, tradition has it, taught and wrote the ‘Zohar’, as you’ll learn, one of the most important of Kabbalistic works.

Then to Abraham Abulafia, the influential 13th century mystic (who believed that the study of Kabbalah could induce states of personal redemption) and later to Rabbi Yitzchak Luria expounded the Zohar’s deepest meanings.

Then it passed to Rabbi Israel Baal Shem Tov the founder of Hassidism and to many his disciples. It has remained the secret knowledge of the initiated, that is, until now.

Kabbalah is Judaism’s secret science, and it is the most important, relevant and interesting Jewish stuff you’ll have come across in ages.

The nature of these ideas means that, you might need to go away and think about them for a while, before they really sink into your head.

Why is Kabbalah Dangerous?

Kabbalah is a philosophy of the nature of Humanity, God and the Cosmos. It is a science of the art of living. It is a path though life, a knowing and enchanting dance between the spiritual and physical. It shows you how to live in complete balance, to live successfully and fully. It can empower you to be at peace with yourself, and to magically transform the world around you. It is a way of seeing and understanding the world that, compels you to find meaning in every moment of everyday.

All the great Jewish thinkers have studied Kabbalah and its teachings have influenced every part of Judaism, yet it has for the most part remained the secret knowledge of the initiated, that is, until now.

The reason why it the Kabbalah has been passed from master to pupil from generation to generation and why there are so few genuine books on Kabbalah is quite simple but extremely profound, and it’s all about effective communication.

When you talk to someone face to face, there is an opportunity for real communication, to can see if the other person is really understanding what you are getting at, and you can adjust your language, tone and hand movements accordingly to help them understand. However, a book is not a dialogue, it is a monologue, it’s me talking at you and not with you, and there is no opportunity for hand movements and gestures, how are you supposed to ‘get’ what it is I’m talking about if you can’t see my hand movements and I can see your bemused face?

The real danger with a book is that, not only will the reader misunderstand and misinterpret what the author meant, but also worse still the book gains some ‘holy’ or ‘sacred’ status and everything in it becomes the open to a more literal interpretation. Or ever worse becomes the rhetoric and dogma of a new ‘religion’, which actually goes against the original intent of the author, which is to help them become more free and happy and discover their own inner teacher, and not enslave them to someone else’s ideas, words and mystical poetry.

There is however, good reason why its teachings have been so closely guarded, over the passed 6000 years. The Sages warn that if the Kabbalah falls into the wrong hands, it could cause madness, destruction and evil.

If the truth be known, even to this day the true secrets of Kabbalah have been shielded from the less initiated, the deeper and more dangerous Kabbalah, remains a mystery to most, and an unspoken subject of the secret Masters of Kabbalah.

Kabbalah in a sense like Rocket Science or Nuclear Physics it is very powerful – but only if put into practice. Likewise without the right type of safety precautions or ideological or ethical maturity it can be very dangerous, not just for the person involved but (believe it or not) for the entire cosmos.

With the ideas contained in this website you have the ability to open a door not only in your mind but they have the power to rip open an alternate gateway within the very fabric of reality itself.

However, this is only if you actually put the knowledge you learn here into practice, otherwise it might just end up being another bookmarked website or rss feed, but unless you take these ideas seriously - you’ll still be living the same relatively superficial and spiritually unrealised life you were before you read this infomation, which would be a big shame, since this might be your last incarnation!?

But it is also ‘dangerous’ on an other level – if you’re scared of being truly happy, of living a profoundly meaningful life, of living your dreams, of taking responsibility for your actions, if you are scared of the divine potential you innately possess – to be yourself and to radically and permanently positively effect the whole world – then this book is dangerous – dangerous because it works – dangerous because it puts the entire responsibility of your life and the future of the world squarely in your own hands - right now!

Separating the World from God is Suicide !

The Ethics of the Fathers teaches that ‘If you are learning and meditating on God and you stop to look at a beautiful tree or a beautiful field you forfeit your life.’ That to me has always seemed a little harsh coming from the bastions of morality. Thankfully however, the great Kabbalist Rabbi Yaakov Yosef of Polnoye explains this teaching slightly differently, he says:

‘If one is learning and meditating on God and one stops – that is, one makes a distinction and does not continue to learn – when one looks at a beautiful tree, or field then you forfeit your life. If you do not see the divine within the world you subsequently make a separation between the holy and mundain then the separation you have made, separates you from the source of all life.’ “

I am a pissed off peaceful person, I don’t think that I can have a more honest reaction or approach to the nature of being human and particularly being Jewish in this day. I have a pure soul, I was a baby, and am still in many way, naive and confused about what exactly this experience, that everyone seemed to have so comfortable eased them selves into, called life, I found so utterly alien.

I still look at my hand, move my fingers and really wonder, what the hell, how can I do that? And what a weird trip to be in the world, to be alive, my underlying voice, is one of wonder, acceptance and confusion. I am always willing to say I’m wrong, to listen, to hear. I realise that I alone can never have all the answers, that truth, whatever that is, is something that is a collective reality. ‘An accurate description of what is.’ I feel in someway passive to this experience, it’s almost as if I’m just along for the ride, looking as a child, in a perpetual state of not knowing. Whatever it is I do know is just a small piece of the whole, and probably corrupted and misinterpreted by my own personal perception and crippling life experiences, that must undeniably filter and colour my view of what is.

Where have I been? in my search for my self, in search of some sense, trying to make sense, of this world, make sense of my life and experience of what is.

From early on I was attracted to ideas that tried to make sense of the whole thing, being Jewish, I liked to explore Judaism’s more mystical teachings, and my pure an holy soul, with honest and truthful yearning, lusted after a life that made sense, a life full of meaning, a life that had answers.

And for a moment or two I did find peace, or something similar to peace, being so preoccupied with doing what God wants, that I didn’t have a moment to think about anything, that I momentarily lost, that special twinkle in my eye, that wonder why. I lost myself in the undercover of God’s world, killing myself to be, this pure and pious Jew, to rebecome, a myth of a soul transcendent, embodied.

I dissolved myself in the rich velvet, of smothering, intoxicating Jewish mysticism. Unable to breathe, for dusty books, of messianic longing, entangled in my souls desire for a global utopia, to become the servant of Moshiach Consciousness. To mend this broken world, shattered shards of God’s divine light, redeemed and whole.

But as I learnt and internalised as best I could, the teaching of the Messiah Himself, The New Torah, my body and mind lifted themselves up from where they thought they had been. From this new place I could see much further, had begun to taste the future. He had glimpsed me a taste of truly forbidden fruits, of ideas so tempting, so utterly dangerous that the very fabric of everything I even thought I may have known, seemed to unravel itself at the seams.

He taught me things that I dared not utter, things and signs that blinded me, with its dark light. A whirlpool of maddening darkness, so utterly dark that it shimmered and shone.

Madness, everyone thinks I must be mad, to call the Rebbe a heretic, because the Rebbe is a righteous man, a Ztadik, and I just a mad, sad and stupid idiot – who, by my own admission, doesn’t know anything.

So my Rebbe is a smiling, Cheshire cat, Buddha-like Jewish heretic, he is my Rebbe, not anyone else’s, but mine. They say the Rebbe is a mirror and you see who you really are, call the Rebbe whatever you want, he is you.
But nonetheless, he showed me things that I, on my own could have never seen or even imagined.

It has been a long journey, so far close to fifteen years of trying to make sense of what the Rebbe said, what he meant, and how and who I am supposed to be and do with it.

I’m not intolerant, just slightly impatient, some things are so clear to me that I get frustrated when otherwise intelligent people show an absolute stupidity towards things.

Obviously every lunatic fanatic thinks that they are right, they are correct, that what they believe is so simple and so utterly obvious, and I’m probably no different.

They say that the Torah of Moses is Hevel (Breath/Nothing/Vanity) compared to the Torah of Moshiach. This I know from personal experience is true.

So much more to say, some other time…

We are sleeping giants,

Formed from dust by the great sky,

Our souls are more powerful than angels,

Our bodies shine brighter than the sun,

Our dreams now our destiny!

Every moment we’re born new!

Children with innocent eyes, hearts, minds wide open, lives of unlimited possibilities.

It’s our choice to be the same as before or to change.

1. no one knows about it - except you (they are just expecting a presentation).

2. the majority of people listening to you - WANT you to Succeed!
3. imagine YOURSELF naked! in front of all those people - ahhh! but really, if you were, worrying about how your
presentation goes is the last thing on your mind - be yourself completely, just as you’re comfortable walking around your own home naked - feel the same level of confidence - whatever it is you do.

4. Have a Plan and Stay Present - focus on the moment look to the future.
5. Imagine it going really well, imagine everyone loving it, loving you and thanking you -
6. Imagine they are all your good friends - quietly cheering you on (see 2)
7. learn to breathe deeply and TRUST yourself, and TRUST LIFE! - the entire cosmos wants you to relax and be yourself completely
7a. It’s not just “safe to be yourself” but in fact your absolute responsibility.

Q. For someone who has been told all their life by their family or peers that they won’t achieve their aims, how can they dispose of negative beliefs? Do they need counselling?

A. It really depends on the individual, it depends on their aims and goals and it depends on how much they believe the peer pressure propaganda.

The three step way to get rid of these negative beliefs are; 1. Realise that the negative lessons you’ve have learnt can be unlearnt and new more accurate and supporting beliefs can replace them. 2. The opinion of the people that fed you this barrage of negativity was probably inaccurate and was definitely unhelpful. 3. Surround yourself with more positive people and feed yourself positive information.

Q. What are the reasons why people commonly lack self-esteem?

A. As babies and young children, we don’t lack self-esteem, it is beaten out of us by our well-meaning parents, teachers and peers. Being confident and being comfortable being yourself completely is, in my opinion, everyone’s natural state, it’s just that we are taught how not to be.
It starts early, when parents say, ‘No! Stop! Don’t do that! They may start off, warning children about sticking their tongues in plug sockets, but within a few years, it becomes more subtle: “Don’t wear that it’ll make you look fat”, or “You could do better, if you only applied yourself… worked hard… stopped answering back… just behaved yourself… listened to the teacher… stopped fidgeting… started paying attention… stopped talking… didn’t play with Tommy … stopped messing around… ate your Brussels Sprouts  … paid more attention in Algebra … worked harder…” You get the picture? All of which restrict us from feeling that we are allowed to be ourselves completely.

Q. Are there any courses available that can improve self-esteem?

A. Yes, from the deeply psychological Hoffman Quadrinity Process, to an Anthony Robbins weekend Empowerment Course. There are Life Coaches that specifically focus on improving confidence and self-esteem. We do a lot of confidence coaching as part of our work at Soulmate Lifestyle Consultancy, helping people to change the way they view their bodies and how they see themselves in the world. So there is help out there, if you know where to look.

Q. If a person is feeling nervous before an interview or important  meeting, what can they do to calm their nerves beforehand?

A. It seems that a lot of slow, deep and rhythmical breathing helps. Learning to be present, stop your mind wondering off into some horrific nightmare scenario of the future (i.e the worse case scenario) or of the past (all the times you messed up or what could have been).

If you are going to imagine the interview, focus in stead on the best case scenario, imagine the meeting going really well, imagine them offering the job to your there and then.

In short:

1.    Have a positive future plan
2.    Breathe, stay calm and focused and keep your awareness in the present moment.

Q. Can a person with low self-esteem fake self-confidence, even if they don’t feel it?

A. Of course people can fake self-confidence, people do it all the time, but it usually comes across as arrogance, cockiness or bravado, and that’s because it’s not a natural worked-out self confidence, it’s forced, it’s pretence. But the good thing about faking it is that in reality people that don’t know you, don’t know that you lake confidence and you can be whoever you want to be and who knows this person you’re pretending to be might even help you become more confident in reality. However, the ‘fake it till you make it’ model only works in the short term. Ultimately you’ve got to start to believe your own hype and work out all the real stuff that is stopping you from just allowing yourself to be yourself completely without any apologies.

Q. If you lack self-esteem, how can you improve it?

A. It’s all about focus, until now you’ve been signed up to your own lousy low self esteem, confidence bruising, internal mind-washing programme, where you constantly play messages to yourself like:
“You’re such an idiot! I’m soooo stupid! I hate her! My bum IS fat! I look awful! I’ll never make it! I can’t do that! Nobody loves me! I’m scared of making a fool of myself! I hate my job! A glass of wine will make it better! I’m not good enough!” Etc…

The first thing to do is start to notice when you say this type of stuff to yourself. Secondly, try saying something kind, encouraging or even positively loving to yourself, like: “I’m good at lots of things! I’m intelligent and attractive! There are many people in my life that love me! I’m a good person! I love being alive! My bum is sexy! I can achieve anything I set my mind to!

But more effective that positive self-talk, is changing the way you view yourself and the world. If you suffer from a lack of confidence and low self-esteem, somewhere along the line you got a very clear message from Life, and that was; ‘It’s not safe for me to be me’.
If you’re going to move forwards towards greater confidence, start to change the fundamental beliefs you have about yourself and the world. Start to TRUST yourself and trust that life loves you and supports you. And ultimately, that the world wants you to succeed and become who you’re meant to be, yourself without compromise.

Q. What are your top five tips for improving self-esteem?

A.

1. Learn to trust, love and accept yourself
2. Make your internal dialogue more positive
3. Have a plan but stay present
4. Surround yourself with positive people
5. Find yourself a Life Coach or Counsellor that specialises in Confidence and self-esteem building

The Secrets of Bilateral Seduction

In the normal course of events if you fancy someone of the opposite sex, or the same sex for that matter, you’re less likely to be yourself and act normally. Yet this abnormal behaviour on your part is precisely what is most likely to put the other person off.

You see that in the slip moment when you see that attractive person across the room there are a million bits of information running around your head and before you’ve even blinked you’ve put yourself in our out of their league.

You see, when you see someone that you find attractive, you subconsciously rate him or her and then also rate yourself. You normally give them a higher rating than yourself; you might give them a 9/10 and give yourself a 6/10.

And this is where the problem lies; if you fancy them and don’t rate yourself very highly, you’re likely to behave in a way that is either slightly desperate or a little bit shy.

Slightly Desperate: could mean that you use corny chat up lines, or beg them to let you buy them a drink, or are just a little creepy or down right in their face and pushy.

Shy: means that you don’t even get around to opening your mouth to say hello.

Now Slightly Desperate is marginally better than Shy, because you’ve jumped over that gap between you and the person you fancy and you’ve made some-kind of attempt at communicating.

But Bilateral Seduction approaches the situation completely differently.

The problem starts at the very beginning, you rate yourself in comparison to other people and most importantly to the person you fancy.

And the point is that if you rate the other person significantly above yourself then you’re more likely to act stupid and stop just being your normal and fantastic self.

So what I’m suggesting is this, learn to rate yourself higher.

That is you first need to find yourself attractive, to become attractive and sexy in your own estimation.

Now obviously there is a difference between arrogance and confidence but it is a subtle although profound one. But not something we need to talk about at this point.

If you increase your own feelings of attractiveness you change the balance of power, between you and the person that you fancy. Instead of you chasing after them in a desperate and slightly embarrassing series of self-fladulating Mr Bean impressions, you become the seductive Casanova, passionate, interesting, exciting and really fanciable person that the other person wants to get to know (in the biblical sense of course).

So you’ve just got to find out what’s going on in the world, you’ve got to know the latest news, current affairs, the celebrity gossip, the weather, you’ve got to know about what’s going on locally, regionally, nationally and internationally.

You’ve got to feed your hunger for information, to quickly absorb the exact information from the news source that reflects your concerns, hopes and aspirations.

So some people read the broadsheets, others the tabloids, listen to the radio, watch the television, download the lasted news feed to their phone, check out the news on their favourite news website. Then not only do we know what’s going on in the world, we’ve also got something to talk about to our friends and associates during the day. Not only is it important to get this information as often as possible but we also need updates about developing stories. So the news media saturates ours lives with information, views and oppinion.

But wait just a minuet, have you ever stopped to think about the impact of this information on your general quality of life?

Quality of Life? What has me reading the news got to do with my quality of life? you might ask?

My quality of life is influenced but my income, by the area I live in, by the job that I have, by my health, my wealth, my primary relationship, by lots of other economic factors that I have little control over.
And all of this may be true, but you’ve missed out one major factor which is the most important, influential and obvious thing which has the most impact on our everyday quality of life, and that is our attitude, perception and focus.

Now as if life in the fast lane wasn’t stressful enough you go and fill you mind with even more negative, stress inducing new information that has very little actual relevance to you day to day running of your life.
Imagine just for a second that the information you got the news media every hour during the day, was really positive and inspiring stuff?

But it’s not, it’s all very negative, emotionally grabbing, worrying, powerful information that tells you generally that; the world is going to the dogs and that locally based international terrorists are about to tax you and brake into your house with knives, kill you and trigger global warming / economic meltdown armogedan and there’s nothing you can do about it.

And if you’re lucky enough not to read or hear about that kind of stuff, the more intelligent media opinions and commentary are all geared and slanted towards being critical, deriding and very cynical and they do this in a way that seems to be an adequate replacement for humour!?!!

OK so I’ve complained enough about the news, but what I am saying? What is my solution to this cascade of negativity that I believe is ruining your quality of life?

It’s a simple two step process:

1. Stop! - Avoid negativity

2. Be positive! - Fill your life with goodness!

Just imagine that you replaced all that millions of bits of negative information with millions of bits of inspiring, wise, positive, happy, hopeful, optimistic, life-affirming information, every day morning and evening, every hour on the hour, on the radio, tv, phone and computer?!!

Just imagine the impact on the real quality of your life of feeding yourself huge amounts of positively saturated information, of filling your mind with happy and inspiring thoughts about how lucky you are and how your life is fantastic and getting even better!?

Do it today! Choose and filter the information that you consume, fill your life with good news, with ideas that inspire you, talk about amazing stuff, about happy stuff, about good stuff.

Sign up to the Urban Guru’s blog and get inspiring information sent to your email!

It’s grey and rainy most of the year round in the UK, so make a point of capturing a little bit of holiday sun and inspiration to carry with you throughout the year. If you do get a chance to go on holiday, make a point of creating a few moments of blissful calm, tranquillity and inspiration, so whether it’s by the pool or walking down a country lane, on standing on top of a mountain, take breathe deeply and turn on your minds video recorder.

Crystallise the experience in your mind and body, be aware of all of your senses, the feeling of the sun warming your face, the cool breeze, the view, the smell, remember this moment and save it to your inner hard-drive, by holding your thumb and forefinger together, so that when you’re waiting for a busy in the cold and bitter rain, you can automatically bring back that stunning summer experience and feel the sunshine on the inside. It may not stop the rain from falling but it might just take the edge off.

Stress at work has a real negative effect on your long-term health and wellbeing, pumping adrenalin around your body, causing increased blood pressure, shutting down your digestive system and stopping you’re higher brain function from functioning.

Stress was our ancestors’ way of staying alive, they needed it to fight or run from dangerous situations, nowadays we mistakenly see our boss or upcoming deadline, as the sabre-toothed tiger.

The answer is to recognise that is your perception of what is, or is not stressful, which triggers your response. Simply make a conscious choice to see your job not as a matter of life or death, but for what it is, just a job.

Work related stress is wearing you down and killing you slowly and it seems that no amount of deep breathing and positive visualisations seem to make it better?

The Urban Guru is here to help:

It’s the simple problem of your own mental perception and your bodies natural fight or flight response. You mistakenly see your boss or upcoming deadline, presentation or deal as the prehistoric monster with VERY BIG TEETH that’s going to eat you! And because you’re telling yourself it’s a real problem your body reacts with it’s fight or flight response.

It’s your own fear, which creates the stress; that pumps adrenalin around your body and causes increased blood pressure and shuts down your digestive system and stops you’re higher brain function from functioning.

So just STOP! Stop prostituting yourself to the corporate monster, let go of your imaginary fear and learn to say “No!” Because you’re worth more than whatever it is they’re paying you in ‘overtime’.

Blessings are metered by OUR ability to receive, not the Universes ability to give. It’s almost like, the Universe would like to give us everything but it is us that says no.

In some sense, as a friend suggested, sometimes it’s our ‘personality’ which gets in the way of blessings. And that sometimes we need to let go of our selves, put our sense of ‘Self’ to one side to simply allow God’s blessings into our lives.

Some say that we have to make a “vessel” a way and a path, for the Universe to bless us. But I believe, more important than the creation of a mere ‘vessel’ or conduit of divine blessing, we ourselves, must become spiritually able and willing to receive blessing into our hearts and into our lives.

The questions we are forced to ask are; are we open enough, receptive enough, willing enough to allow the divine to give us everything and more? Are we ready to accept bliss into our every moment of our lives?!!!?

Say to yourself; “I’m sorry for having previously been a barrier to receiving blessings, I forgive you for the past, I now allow you to accept all blessings into your heart with joy and love. I allow the source of all blessings to flow through me, so that peace is my very being and the abundance of blessing my inheritance!”

Most of us might plan a few weeks in advance, we might even book our summer holidays in at the beginning of the year, but very few people actually make a plan for their life.

Where would I like to be in five or ten years time? How do I want to be? What kind of life do I want to live? Where? With whom? What kind of job or pastime do I want to be doing and enjoying?

And this is one of the many Life Coaching tools – the five year plan.

But before you go off, drawing up your plan and running off making big changes in your life, stop for a moment.

Lets take a step back and think about the destination again.

Where are you going? Let’s take a few moments to really think about where you want your life to go.

A few very useful question I ask people are;

1. How would you feel if you won the lottery?
2. What would you do with the money?
3. How does it change your life?
4. After some years of spending and living the hi life – what do you do?
5. Can you imagine your future life in detail?
6. How does it feel?
7. How can you do that now?
8. How can you move forward towards your current life goals?

You see you really need to figure out where you want to be heading BEFORE you start running away in that general direction.

But now that you’ve got a slightly better idea, we can start planning!

It doesn’t have to be a very detail plan, just a sketch, an outline, I find it works best if you plan backwards.

Year 5 -

Year 4 -

Year 3 -

Year 2 -

Year 1 -

Now you can begin to run towards your future - even though this plan may change, at least you’ve now got a much clearer idea and vision of where you are going.

Good luck!

Escape from the city, and from the humdrum and stresses of everyday life…

Sometimes we all need to escape from the din of city living, step outside of our everyday selves and reassess the way we live, to help us gain new and different perspective on our lives.

Our Weekend ‘Shabbaton’ Urban Guru Retreat is the perfect time and place to do this as it’s entirely dedicated to your personal spiritual growth and development. It is an ideal chance to breathe and focus on becoming more relaxed, spiritualy centred and balanced. It is an opportunity to reassess your life, discover your souls path, and a chance to focus on cultivating your own happiness, inner joy and peace of mind. So when you do return to your life you can begin to live it on a higher plane, were you can be more focussed, calm, and alive.

Urban Guru Retreats, usually take place over a weekend (or Shabbaton) Friday - Sunday, in a converted farm near Buxton in the Peak Park UK. They are very laid back and relaxing, the weekend is a mixture of lectures and workshops, focusing on wide variety of themes.

This included workshops in various forms of Kabbalistic meditation, from the early Merkvah school - to modern day forms of Hassidic consciousness expanding techniques.

The themes of the lectures vary - and they can focus on that weeks Torah reading - although not always so. We try to keep some semblance of a traditional Shabath from Friday to Saturday night although we are not dogmatic about it.

As participants are asked to refrain from using there mobile phones throughout their time at the retreat etc…There are group activities and ‘prayer’ workshops, as well as one on one learning and mentoring.

All the activities are completely voluntary… if someone doesn’t wish to participate and even just spend the entire weekend in their room that’s fine - if that is what they need to do.

The food is Kosher* and Vegetarian and were possible locally produced and/or organic. It is generally for small groups with a maximum of 12 people.